Written by Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists, the Marriage in a Box blog shares insights into common relationship struggles, gives ideas for moving beyond the roadblocks, and helps you find your path to happiness – both individually and within your relationship.
Anxiety is a physical response to fear. It’s the body’s “fight or flight” reaction to a real or perceived threat. When the threat is real, you fight or flee, and your body uses up the chemicals it released. When the threat is not real, your body is flooded with neurochemicals with nowhere to go. You shake, your heart pounds, your breathing gets shallow, etc. Anxiety results from your body burning off these chemicals when there wasn’t physical exertion to do it. Some people perceive threats more easily and more often, leading to anxiety or even panic attacks. However, there are ways to cope with this once you realize what is happening. If your teen is prone to anxiety, here are ways that you and they can cope.
A happy marriage requires daily intentional care and attention. However, many people go into marriage with the idea that Marriage will magically solve all of their problems. The look for what marriage can do for them rather than what they can do for their marriage. Here are 6 things you can do to make your marriage better:
Don’t dwell on your Spouse’s shortcomings.
Everyone has both positive and negative qualities. If you spend your time focusing on what’s bad about your spouse instead of their positive qualities, your marriage will suffer. Choose to focus on what you love about your spouse.
Make your spouse feel needed.
We all need each other. No man (or woman) is an island. Knowing that a person needs you and relies on you makes you feel loved and necessary. Ask your spouse for help, it will make them feel good.
Pay Your Spouse a Compliment or Drop a Word of Appreciation daily.
What man won’t get weak in the knees when he receives a text message saying that you are yearning for his embrace when he gets home tonight? What woman won’t have a better day when she gets a love note on her pillow before you leave for work? Verbal compliments and words of appreciation are powerful communicators of love.
Engage in physical contact outside of the bedroom.
Bodily contact does not always need to be sexual intercourse in order to arouse feelings of connectedness and love. Hold hands when you walk together. Snuggle up together on the couch and watch a TV show or movie. Give each other a kiss before you each start your day. Hug your partner when you know they have had a bad day. Touching and closeness send the message that you love them and that you care.
Take time out from your busy day to listen to your Spouse.
Nothing makes a person feel more valued than when you take the time to truly sit down and listen to what they have to say. It is a small way to show that you care about your spouse.
Support your partner’s passions.
You may have a passion for crafting but have very little time to devote to it. He may be an avid runner but struggles to get time to get out on the trail. Tell your spouse that you will take care of (fill in the blank: kids/chores/parents etc.) while they take some time to pursue their passion. Giving our partner time to pursue their passion shows that you still care about their happiness and respect their talents and passions.
America today has become a melting pot for different cultures and more people are marrying someone from a different religion or racial/ethnic group than in years past. The rate of interracial marriages increased by 28 percent in the last decade, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.
Marrying someone from a different culture can provide some beautiful and enriching opportunities for growth. However, when people of different cultural backgrounds fall in love and get married, certain cultural differences can pose a challenge to the marriage. Some of the more common cause of tension in such marriages are:
Any marriage will have its share of arguments but some arguments can be avoided before they even begin. Many arguments in the marriage arise because one spouse didn’t listen to the other or did not support the other. Consider this example:
Every marriage has its highs and lows, good days and bad. After you have been married a while, it is easy to become comfortable in routine activities and mediocre relationship status. Beware! When you neglect your marriage and stop working at keeping that spark between you alive, you open the door to your spouse looking elsewhere to find that spark. How can you tell if your marriage has grown stale?
When two people get married, it is often assumed that they will share a mutual attraction, similar values, and similar expectations about lifestyle. One commonly over looked trait couples should also share is a sense of humor.
Making a Marriage work takes a lot of effort and life can throw many curveballs your way. Having a shared sense of humor can help get you through life’s rough patches. Why?
Having a friendship with your spouse provides the solid ground beneath your feet. It is an emotional bond greater than the romantic feelings and sexual desires in a marriage. It is not just a physical connection but also a mental and emotional connection that creates longevity in your relationship. How do you know if you and your spouse are also friends?
Make sure you have a solid foundation in place and resolving little disagreements before they grow into fights, and you will increase your chance of having a divorce-proof marriage.
Don’t Take Your Spouse for Granted, Say Thank You. It sounds so simple, yet those two words don’t get expressed as often as they should in many long-term marriages. Say thank you when your spouse makes a great meal or does the yard work. Each spouse will feel appreciated and happier in your marriage overall.
