Making Changes In Your Relationship
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- Focus on What You Can Do: Work on the things you can change as opposed to the things that are not in your control. Focus on what needs to happen as opposed to dwelling on what shouldn’tor didn’t happen. This perspective can help you make faster progress.
- Think Chicken or the Egg? Either partner can jump in at any point to change a negative pattern. It doesn’t matter who makes the first move to change for the better, as long as both partners participate in the process once initiated.
- Keep Reminders: It’s important to keep reminders of your practices and goals accessible. View them daily on your computer, refrigerator, bathroom mirror, work space, or car visor. Constant reminders will help with consistency and accelerate change.
- Replace: Make it a point to constantly replace the old way of thinking with the new tools learned within Marriage In A Box. Continually replacing the old with the new will cement healthy patterns of interacting. For example, replace blaming (old way: “You made me feel bad…”) with using an “I” statement (new way: “I felt hurt when…”).