Can Your Marriage Weather A Job Loss?
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Unemployment can be a root of many problems such as lack of money, time management, and self-control. Often times, problems that existed in the marriage before the job loss can get magnified when unemployment hits.
If you are going to weather through this job loss, you can’t afford to tear each other down or apart. Now is the time when you need to be able to reassure your spouse that things are going to be okay and he or she needs to reassure you that you that you important and have value.
Four things will get you and your spouse through this job loss: Understanding, Communication, Trust, and Affection.
Ask for understanding.
Own up to poor job performance, poor reviews, or a specific incident at work that led to your being let go. Support in a marriage includes being truthful when it hurts. Yes, it is painful at the time, but it is the beginning of healing. Be honest with your spouse about what caused your job loss and ask for understanding.
Remain calm and treat your job search as if it is your job.
Panicking and getting angry will cause the entire family to do the same. Calmly talk about your job loss with your spouse and reassure her or him that you will find another job. Talk about options such as looking in your field, networking with friends and others in the industry, and actively shoring up our skills so your will be more marketable. Involving your souse in the planning will help put a positive spin on things.
Keep up your work hours and stay the course
You are not on vacation because you lost your job. This is not your time to sleep late, start doing those extra projects around the house you have been wanting to get to, etc. You need to maintain your work ethic and be aggressively researching, networking and pursuing job leads. It is important that your spouse and family see you working hard to land a new job.
Be affectionate and open with your spouse.
This is a time when you both need to lean in towards each other and lean on each other for support, encouragement and love. You and your spouse are going through this job loss together. You will need to talk about ways to tighten your belts, cut back on unnecessary expenditures, do without luxuries and make do with less until things turn around.
Share small victories
Let your spouse read through your updated resume and accept her corrections positively. Did you land an interview? Celebrate that with your spouse. Frequent sharing of job hunting victories will show transparency, build trust, and release stress.
Unemployment could last a while but it will not last forever. Your marriage will survive a job loss if you lean into one another and work together to keep you love alive.
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